Do You Feel Ashamed?

First off, let me welcome you to this page and say that you have come to the right place for help and resources.  Secondly, we will not judge you or make you feel ashamed for being pregnant. You are not alone in dealing with your unexpected pregnancy and these resource centers can assist you.

If you are like many of the women who are seeking our resources, you may be feeling a great deal of shame. Maybe you are ashamed about the circumstances of your getting pregnant, or ashamed that you already have children and you are afraid about what others might think.  Do these thoughts sound familiar?

“What will my boss and coworkers think? I’m up for a new promotion.”

“My husband is going to flip when I tell him I’m pregnant again.”

“My parents are going to disown me.”

If you look up the definition of “shame” you’ll read, "a: a painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt, shortcoming, or impropriety; b: the susceptibility to such emotion”; a condition of humiliating disgrace or disrepute”. (Merriam-Webster, 2017). If you can relate to these words, what is really causing you to feel guilty or disgraceful? Is it your friends and family who have condemned you for getting pregnant outside of marriage? Or are you afraid of what people will think if you have another child after having a few at home already? Whatever it is, I cannot imagine the pain you are feeling. But let me tell you this: these people do not control you, nor do they know what is best for you and your child. Only you know this. Imagine what life would be like if we made important life decisions based on what others want for us, instead of what WE want for ourselves? I don’t know about you, but I would probably feel a lot of regret and would wonder, “What if I had chosen differently?”

Now, you may be wondering, “What do you know about my situation? How are you any different than the other people in my life?” Well, I have witnessed several women handle unplanned pregnancies and I can tell you there are more options available to you other than getting an abortion. You can still have your baby and finish school, move up in your career, or provide for the rest of your family. The pregnancy resource centers are full of caring people who know what it’s like to be in your situation and can help you plan your future in a healthy and productive way. Shame is a strong force that blinds the truth. Allow yourself to make an informed decision with the information provided by people who are looking out for your best interest, as well as your baby’s. You’d be surprised at how empowering it feels to have faith in yourself and reap the benefits.